[ Saya lays back and considers this. ]

I've been on both sides. One where I was the only one who could change things for the better. And I don't mean I was the strongest person or the person who felt chosen by fate or whatever, I was literally the only one. It was me, or nothing. And I hated it every day. I didn't get close to anyone except unwittingly, and even then I kept them at a distance. It was misery.

And I've been in a situation where I had as much power as the others around me over things, which was none. So I took comfort in those around me however I could, as did many others. If a chance arose to change things, I'd have taken it, but I wouldn't have resented those who chose otherwise.

I don't know if it's wrong for you on your world, I doubt anyone not from your circumstances could say one way or the other, and trying to would be the height of arrogance. [ Which explains Red Son, lol. That and a massive inferiority complex that he's overcompensating for. ]

So I'll say... I think wanting to enjoy the time you have is understandable. I wouldn't judge you for any choice you made.