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[sangreine]

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[happydreamed]

[He trembles in her hold. He doesn't deserve this comfort, but he's selfish enough to take it anyway.]

He was my family. He took care of me, he did so much for me, and I killed him. What kind of person...

[sangreine]

[ As long as he'll accept the comfort, she'll continue to give it. ]

You were in a very sad situation, and that makes people do drastic things. [ It's not her place to excuse what he did, but she understands it. ]

[happydreamed]

[He squeezes her tightly.]

...I'm afraid, Aliza. Now that I know this about myself - even if it wasn't the same me, I am that kind of person. Knowing how I responded to one loved one's mind degrading, losing memories... I am terrified of how I will respond if we can't stop your hibernation.

[sangreine]

[ ... ]

[ Her arms around him loosen by slow degrees. He can't kill her, so. Is he saying...? ]

[ Saya tightens her hold once again. It's only fair that he might not be able to handle it. She gets it, and she doesn't blame him. It hurts, but how could she be so selfish as to ask him to stay with her if it caused him such pain. It doesn't matter anyway; she loves him. If that's only going to last until she starts sleeping more and more, then that's how it has to be. ]

...I understand. It's okay.

[happydreamed]

I'm so, so sorry. I hate the thought of leaving you for any reason, but... I am a weak and selfish person, after all.

[He hates himself for it. He wouldn't blame her for hating him, too.]

[sangreine]

[ Part of her really wants to ask what he was thinking agreeing to get married after they got here, since he had his memories back by then. Maybe he didn't realize the extent of it? But, again, it doesn't matter. ]

[ Her inhale is shaky, but she doesn't cry. This isn't his fault and she won't make him feel worse. ]

Just... tell me before you go, okay? Please. So I can say goodbye.

[happydreamed]

[He squeezes her tightly again, and breathes in.]

-I spoke to Yuri about it. Who told me that things would be easier, since I wouldn't be the only one taking care of you. Because we have ways to return some of your memories to you, instead of you simply continuing to waste away forever. That things would be different.

So - I understand if you don't believe me. But at the moment, I have no intention of leaving you.

[sangreine]

[ Everything in her wants to yank away, because not knowing sounds even worse than certainty that he'll leave. But... could she bear to tell him so if maybe he'd stay? Not a chance. ]

...Okay. [ It doesn't sound like she particularly believes him, no. It's self-preservation, not doubt in him. ]

[ There has to be a way to change this. Stop her life cycle. Something in all this magic that can fix it, because she can't lose another love. ]

[happydreamed]

[She doesn't sound like she believes him. He wouldn't believe himself either.]

...There must be some way to stop your hibernation. I'll search tirelessly until I can promise you it will never trouble either of us.

[sangreine]

[ She nods and rests her cheek against his shoulder. It occurs to her that this is why her kind was meant to have Chevaliers, so they can't be left behind. Even so, she'll never make another one. Even if they ever make it to Teyvat, she'd be alone. ]

I'm sorry. You shouldn't have to hurt because of me.

[happydreamed]

I should be the one saying that to you. -I love you, Aliza. More than anything in any world.

[That will always be true, no matter what.]

[sangreine]

I love you, too. [ Despite that he's hurt her this way. It's not his fault, it's hers. ]

...If I go out for a while to unwind, you won't read into it, will you? I just need to move.

[ And think. She needs time to get her sobbing out so she can come back and not make the time they do have miserable and steeped in pre-emptive grief. ]

I'll be back tonight, I promise.

[happydreamed]

Take all the time you need. I'll be here.

[He might do a little crying of his own while she's gone.]

[sangreine]

[ She gives him a gentle kiss on the cheek. ]

No matter what happens, I'll never regret marrying you. And I'm not going to spend the time we have in mourning, either.

So when I get back, I'll do whatever I can to make things as good as they can be for as long as we have. I promise. [ She can't promise to fix her life cycle before it's too late, but that much she can do. If it eats away at her, then that's fine. It's her burden to bear. ]

[happydreamed]

Nor will I regret it. [He smiles weakly.] You will always, always be the love of my life, my dear. That I can promise.

[sangreine]

[ She pulls away and tries her best to smile. It's a better attempt than she thought it would be, that's something. ]

Good. That's all I need to know.

[ That and the location of some hyper-caffeine berries or something. She's a fighter, she's not giving him up without a fight. ]